In a world of distractions and pressures, finding clarity and purpose can often feel overwhelming to even consider. We are inundated with societal expectations, pressures to perform, and the endless chase for "success."  But despite achieving external markers of success, many of us still feel disconnected, stifled and worse of all, unfulfilled.

What is it that causes this feeling when we've checked all of the proverbial "boxes" and still feel unfulfilled?

The answer is often that we are living at odds with our values.

Our values are the guiding principles that give our lives meaning and direction. They reflect what we believe is most important and play a significant role in defining our success. When we align our lives with our deeply held core values, we create a path that is not only fulfilling but also sustainable above all other paths. In this article, we will explore the importance of values, how they shape our lives, and how to align with them for a more authentic, purposeful existence. 

What are Personal Values?

Personal values are the deeply held concepts and ideas that allow us to know what we believe is true, right, or good. Our values assist us in forming our foundation for morality and ethical decision-making, shaping our perceptions. Personal values influence our behavior, decisions, and interactions with the world. They are the compass by which we navigate life. They are the internalized philosophical elements for which we assess meaning and 'value' to what we perceive in the world. While society often promotes values like wealth, power, and recognition, personal values are unique to each individual. They are vast and varied, but might include things like integrity, compassion, creativity, or balance. And though you and I may have the same value, it's expression and manifestation in our lives may be completely different.

Our personal values serve as the foundation for how we prioritize our time, energy, attention, and financial resources. Our values exist whether we consciously realize it or not. We experience a sense of harmony and fulfillment when we are aligned with our personal values. When our lives lack this harmony and our actions and choices conflict with our values, we often feel discontent, anxiety, or a lack of clear direction. It is a sure sign that we are out of touch with our deepest core personal values.

At first examination of yourself, this may not seem to be the case. One might read this and think that doesn't apply to me. But if you're reading this it most likely applies, it is simply a question of your awareness. 

Why Values are Key to Defining Success

Success is often defined by external achievements—career promotions, financial stability, accolades, or social recognition. While these accomplishments can be rewarding, they don’t necessarily lead to fulfillment if they are not aligned with your personal values. Many of us begin our life journey's embodying someone else's value set. We simply don't know ourselves well-enough for lack of experience. 

What happens when achieving all the trappings of success—money, status, influence—leaves you feeling empty because those achievements didn’t resonate with who you truly are? This misalignment between the achievements and your personal values can leave you questioning whether you’ve been pursuing the right goals all along.

By contrast, when success is aligned with your personal values, it feels more authentic and sustainable. More authentic because its connected to who you are at your core. Sustainable because you are able to stay motivated through adversity.

If you value creativity, success might mean working in a field where you can express your ideas freely. You are able to explore, express and expend your creative energy freely. If you value personal connection, success might be about cultivating deep, meaningful relationships in your life rather than accumulating wealth.

Aligning success with your values allows you to define it on your own terms, leading to a more fulfilling and joyful life.

The Role of Values in Living a Fulfilling Life

Living in alignment with your values helps you make decisions that feel right to you, even when they go against the grain of societal expectations. For example, if your top value is family, you may choose to prioritize time with your loved ones over advancing in your career, even if society tells you that professional success should come first.

When you know your values and live by them, you create a life that is congruent with your true self. This congruence leads to greater self-respect, confidence, and peace of mind because you are living in a way that honors your deepest beliefs. It becomes easy to make decisions that were once difficult. The road ahead becomes clear and a sense of direction takes hold. You'll begin to attract others with similar values and missions. It all can starts with a deeper sense of self-awareness.

How to Identify Your Core Values

Identifying your core values is the first step toward aligning your life with what truly matters. However, this process isn’t always straightforward. Many of us have absorbed values from our family, culture, or society that may not necessarily reflect our true selves.

Below is an exercise from my coaching program that will help you uncover your personal values:

Exercise: Clarifying Your Core Values

• Reflect on Peak Experiences
  Think back to the moments in your life when you felt the most fulfilled, proud, or content. What was happening in those moments? Who were you with? What were you doing? Write down what made these experiences so meaningful to you. Look for recurring themes or values in these experiences, such as connection, achievement, or independence. 
• Identify Your Top Five Values
  Review the themes from your reflection and begin narrowing them down. Identify the five values that resonate the most with you. These should be the guiding principles that you want to prioritize in your life.

  Click Here for a Values Inventory Worksheet.

• Test Your Values
  Once you have identified your top five values, put them to the test. For each value, ask yourself: “Am I living this value every day?” “What decisions have I made based on this value?” If there are values that you aren't actively honoring in your life, think about why that might be and how you can incorporate them more meaningfully moving forward.
• Work Backwards
  If you're having difficulty, try this. Consider the actions you've taken today, this week, or this month. Simple actions that are common on your to-do list. Ask yourself "What value is this action in service to?" You may not find a simple answer to this question. For example, grocery shopping may reveal several values. It may reveal a value of healthy eating. Depending on where you shop, you may be expressing a value of environmental conservation. If you use coupons, you may have a value of thrift. In each of these examples, you can see there is a multitude of potential values. But when you consider your example, what resonates with you the most? What value does that resonance suggest

This exercise will help give you clarity on the values that are most important to you. From here, the next step is to begin aligning your actions and decisions with these values.

Aligning Your Life with Your Values

Once you have identified your core values, it’s time to align your life with them. This requires ongoing reflection and intentionality, but the rewards are profound. Here are some ways to align your life with your values:

• Make Values-Based Decisions
  When faced with a decision, ask yourself how each option aligns with your values. For example, if one of your core values is adventure, choosing a career path that offers travel opportunities might align better than one that keeps you in an office. When your decisions reflect your values, you’ll feel more confident and at peace with the direction you’re heading. 
• Prioritize Your Time
  How you spend your time is a direct reflection of your values. If you say you value health but spend most of your free time working or watching TV, you may feel a sense of disconnection. Start prioritizing activities that align with your values, like exercising, spending time with loved ones, or engaging in creative pursuits. This will help you live a more fulfilling life.
• Set Values-Based Goals
  When setting goals, ensure they are rooted in your core values. This will keep you motivated and focused, even when challenges arise. For example, if you value growth and learning, a goal might be to enroll in a course that enhances your skills or knowledge. If you value contribution, a goal might be to volunteer regularly. 
• Create Boundaries
  Living in alignment with your values may require you to set boundaries with others. For instance, if you value balance but find yourself working late into the night, you may need to set clearer boundaries around your work hours. Or, if you value relationships but find certain connections draining, you may need to reevaluate those relationships and set limits.
• Regularly Reevaluate Your Values
  As you grow and evolve, so might your values. Regularly check in with yourself to see if your current values still resonate or if they need to be adjusted. Life is dynamic, and staying attuned to your values will help you navigate change with greater ease.

Real-Life Application: Values in Action

Let’s look at how aligning with values can change someone’s life. Consider a client of mine, who felt stuck in her high-paying corporate job. Despite her financial success, she felt drained and unfulfilled. It was daunting to even consider going to work. After going through a values-clarification exercise, she realized that her top values were creativity, freedom, and connection—none of which were truly being honored in her current role nor was there space for them in her life.

With this new clarity, she began exploring opportunities that aligned with her values. She eventually left her corporate job and started her own freelance business, allowing her the freedom to work on creative projects and connect with clients in a more meaningful way. By aligning her life with her values, she found a deeper sense of purpose and fulfillment.

Exercises to Help You Align with Your Values

 In my coaching programs, I provide exercises to help you not only clarify your values but also integrate them into your daily life. Here are a few that you can try on your own:

Exercise 1: Values Check-In

Each week, set aside time to reflect on how well you are living in alignment with your values. Journal about the decisions you made, the time you spent, and how you felt. Identify areas where you drifted from your values and make adjustments for the coming week.

Exercise 2: Value-Based Goal Setting

Write down one goal for each of your top five values. Make sure these goals are specific, actionable, and aligned with what truly matters to you. Track your progress and celebrate the milestones you achieve as you live more authentically.

Exercise 3: Create a Values Vision Board

Gather images and words that represent your core values and create a vision board. Place it somewhere visible to remind yourself daily of what matters most to you. This visual representation will keep you motivated and aligned with your values as you move through life.

Conclusion: Living a Values-Driven Life

Aligning your life with your values is not a one-time exercise; it is a lifelong practice of self-discovery and intentional living. In truth, it is the rewarding part of our journey. When you commit to living in alignment with what truly matters to you, success and fulfillment become byproducts of your actions. It's magic. Your values serve as the foundation for every decision, action, and goal you pursue, ensuring that you create a life that is not only successful but also deeply meaningful.

If you’re ready to take the next step in aligning your life with your values, consider scheduling a complimentary coaching consultation with me. 

CLICK HERE TO SCHEDULE!

Together, we’ll explore your values, set meaningful goals, and create a roadmap to help you live a life that truly resonates with who you are. Don’t let another day go by feeling disconnected from your true self—start living your values today.

All the best,